What's the Proper Guest Etiquette for a Destination Wedding?

Destination weddings are becoming much more popular, but with this latest trend comes a whole new set of rules. As the guest, make sure you know what’s expected of you before you pack your bags and hop on that plane.

Don’t Complain
Once you’ve returned the RSVP card with a yes, you’ve lost your right to complain. Figure out how much the destination wedding will cost you and make peace with it; after all, your friend would do it for you. Put a little money aside for unforeseen costs and make sure you budget for activities -- you don’t want to miss out on a minute of fun. Treat the wedding as a much-needed vacation you’ve been meaning to take for years.

Respectfully Decline
If you decide not to attend the wedding for financial reasons, keep it to yourself. Don’t put a damper on the bride and groom’s event; they’re aware that not everyone will be able to come. Simply RSVP no and write a note explaining that although you’d love to be there, you’re unable to attend. If the couple prompts you for a reason, offer to treat them to dinner after they come back so you can hear all about the wedding. Attend all the prewedding events, and keep in mind that regardless of attendance, you should always send them a wedding gift.

Educate Yourself
Whether you’re going to Acapulco or Istanbul, it’s important to educate yourself on the customs and laws. The last thing you want to deal with is getting detained in a foreign country due to a misunderstanding. Brush up on local customs and try to learn a little bit of the language, such as “hi,� “bye,� “please,� and “thank you� at the very least. A book with words spelled phonetically would be ideal. Above all else, remember that you’re a guest in that country and you should treat the locals with respect.

Don’t Be Annoying
You may be there to support the bride and groom, but that doesn’t mean you have to hang out with the happy couple every minute! Attend the scheduled dinners and activities, but also give them some down time. If you plan on staying at the resort while the couple is honeymooning there, make yourself scarce. This is their time to be newlyweds…alone! Plan your own activities (it’s nice to extend an invite, but don’t expect them to come) and elicit help from the resort’s concierge for suggestions.

Be Prepared
Like any vacation, the key to a stress-free destination wedding is plan, plan, plan! Make a checklist of everything you’ll need, like your passport, ID, plane tickets, and hotel confirmation. Buy an organizer that’ll help you keep everything in order. Don’t forget to pack your must-have toiletries and medicine (make sure any liquids you pack are in FAA-approved containers and that your prescriptions will last the duration of the trip). The resort or hotel will most likely have anything you’ve forgotten, but with all the fun activities planned, the last thing you’ll want to do is run to the drugstore.