 Dr. Dale Atkins understands your wedding woes and has the perfect sanity-saving solutions for emotional issues, family questions, and fears about the engagement, wedding planning, and future.
 | My fiancé and I have been arguing over what to give as favors at our wedding. Ultimately, we both agreed on a donation to St. Jude's Children's Hospital. In making such a donation, the hospital will send us something we could give to each guest, so that they could see that a donation was made in their name. So far, our families have loved the idea, but there are four people who think it is the worst idea ever -- and they constantly mock us and the gift. My fiancé and I both love this idea, so tell me: Is this favor as dumb as they think? |  |  | Congratulations on your and your fiancé having a cause in which you both believe. Marriage is a commitment to becoming a couple, certainly, but also a commitment to ideals and morals. Determining what is important to both of you, and then following through on those things, strengthens your values -- and your relationship.
By making this generous donation at your wedding, you are announcing to all present just who and what you and your fiancé are all about and what you stand for, so by all means ignore those few naysayers and do what your heart has compelled you to do. Do not ignore those who have voiced their opinions; simply let them know they have been heard, and then do what you know is true and right for you as a couple. By continuing in your desire to do such a good deed, you are not only establishing your beliefs as a couple, but you are introducing a number of people to a wonderful charity and its mission. | |  Dr. Dale Atkins is a professional psychologist and frequent media expert specializing in couple and family relationships. Dr. Dale is also an author with five books to her credit: Sisters; Families and Their Hearing Impaired Children; From the Heart (co-author); I'm OK, You're My Parents; and the most recently published, Wedding Sanity Savers (co-author). Currently living in Connecticut with her husband and dog, Dr. Dale has two grown sons and a private practice in New York City. | |