Preparation:
Start thinking about what you would like to wear to the rehearsal dinner a few weeks in advance. If you are wearing something from your current wardrobe, keep in mind that it may need to be dry-cleaned, altered or coordinated with something you have yet to buy. If you want to wear something new, you will need to find something you feel comfortable in and is appropriate for the occasion. You don’t want to end up wearing something you settled for at the last minute; not only will you feel uncomfortable, but it will probably be obvious to your guests.
If you plan on buying something new to wear, consider working with a personal shopper; many stores offer this service free of charge. If the store doesn’t have personal shoppers, ask the manager of the department you are looking in for advice; usually they have helped other grooms-to-be suit up for the rehearsal dinner.
Dress Code:
Is the rehearsal dinner formal, casual or somewhere in-between? The degree of formality is usually determined by where the dinner is held and what type of food is served. The rehearsal is quite obviously, a rehearsal, but more importantly, it is a time to spend with those closest to both of you before you embark on your new life together. Put your best foot forward!
Traditionally, the parents of the groom host the rehearsal dinner; if this is the case, discuss the dress code with them and find out what they feel is appropriate. Because the wedding is usually the domain of the bride’s family, the rehearsal dinner is a chance for your parents to set the tone and mood for the evening. Many couples have a much less formal rehearsal dinner as a counterpoint to the formality of their wedding. However, you should plan on coordinating your clothing with your fiancée so that she’s not dressed for a five-star restaurant and you look like you are headed to the beach. Dressing in similar styles doesn’t mean that you should look like twins, only that your clothing choices should complement each other.
What to Wear:
For more formal rehearsals, a suit and tie is the perfect choice. Adding personal details, like cufflinks or a tie that your fiancée gave you, is a nice touch. Depending on the degree of formality, you may choose not to wear a tie. For something a little less dressy, you can wear a nice pair of khakis and a dress shirt. If you decide to have a casual rehearsal dinner, you can pair the aforementioned khakis with a polo shirt or sweater, and for the most casual of rehearsal dinners, like a BBQ, jeans are acceptable (not the ones with the holes in them). When making your clothing choices, don’t forget that you may want to take some of these items on your honeymoon, in which case, you might be better off choosing something that will not conflict with what you plan on packing. After all, the last thing you’ll want to do when you reach your honeymoon destination is laundry.
Head to Toe:
Don’t forget the details: make sure you get a haircut a few days before the rehearsal dinner. The reason is two-fold: one, you won’t have time between the rehearsal and the wedding to do it and two, you want to look good. Polish your shoes, press your clothing and smile.
Get Some Shut-Eye:
Although it may sound like asking for the impossible, try to be as rested as you can. Because the rehearsal and the dinner following it are part of the wedding, you can expect photographs and possibly video to capture the occasion on film for all eternity. You don’t want to look back at photographs of an exhausted-looking groom wearing a rumpled and inappropriate outfit, so take the time to look your best.
Enjoy:
At this point, most of the details of the wedding day have been taken care of and now you just have to show up. Don’t spread yourself too thin because you are going to need reserved energy for the wedding. In addition to giving the wedding party a chance to ask the wedding planner or officiant any last minute questions about the ceremony, the rehearsal dinner is an opportunity for the couple to visit with their families and close friends. The wedding is not the best time to say more than a few words to your guests, so use the dinner as a chance to individually thank and acknowledge the family and friends that are present. To find out who exactly should be included in these festivities, read The Rehearsal.
After all is said and done, the most important thing is that you both have a good time. The rehearsal dinner will probably help smooth out some of your anxieties about the details of the ceremony and reassure you of what exactly happens and when. When your wedding day has arrived at last, you will have the confidence that comes from knowing what you are doing and looking good doing it.
Find more tips for planning your rehearsal dinner on our Parties & Showers page.
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